Lets Get These teen Hearts Beating Faster, Faster

The one day a year where you can possibly endanger someones life and maybe even get away with it. Me and my sister are going to be pulling pranks left, right and centre, the same game every year. Starting at midnight tonight we see who can pull the most pranks on others (i.e Dad,Natasha,me or my sister,visiters pets whatever) the winner holds the title of Prankster of the Year. I'm looking forward to it and can barely withold my excitement.

Came back from Camden. I actually went on my own and i t was, dare I say it fun. I just walked around, looked in the shops and generally enjoyed myself. Who needs others to have fun? Maybe I'm turning into a loner, and I actually don't mind.

Auditions for the UK theatre version of High School Musical and I am SO scared. If I don't get in I am going to cry, scream and then storm out of there like the diva I am. I've finally figured out a way to cope as well. What I do is if I ever feel like cutting I cut. But just not myself. I cut open sachets of ketchup and squeeze it out like it is my blood. It actually works for me, and I tried the whole "break in emergency" idea that someone gave me. What if the people at the audition see my scars? looks like long sleeves to me.

THOUGHT FOR TODAY: What bright spark thought it was a good idea to put the letter 's' in the word lisp? Its really annoying (escpecially for me I hav a lisp)

Welcome back to the life of me. This is my second post on here and I think I can safely say I love the whole blogging experience.

Anyway my dad and his wife are really getting on my nerves. She drives me up the wall. She doesn't like me let me make that as clear as crystal, she even said so to my dad when she thought I wasn't listening but I was.

Now I don't care when someone doesn't like me I'm not going to change but to be downright spiteful is another thing. Like when she cooks dinner she puts chicken on my plate even though she knows I'm a vegetarian, or like when she makes snide little comments about my dress sense who is she to talk? she's dresses far to young. Or like the time she told my dad not to let me get the top of my ear pierced because "its dangerous" (It's actually making me want to do it behind their back).

Funny how when shes saying that I'm a bad person she fails to mention the fact that my little sister who is only 1yr 1mth 1week younger (exact) than me goes out and doesn't come back until past her curfew, or the fact that I'm passing all of my classes with A's and maybe a few Bs, or the fact that I am going to go to a good college. None of that matters to her because she doesn't like me. Well I don't like her and if not for my dad she would have definatly earned a slap in the face for the way she talks to me.

My sister has just learnt to sew sequins and my jeans have paid the price for it. It was yin yang and I actually wouldnt have minded had she not had sewn it upside down. The Yin was on the wrong side!

THOUGHT FOR TODAY: what happens if a black cat walks under a ladder and breaks a mirror?

30/03/07 - 16:34

Okay so I understand that you may not have a clue who I am. And if you don't then you don't need to know and if you do thats cool. I decided one day just out of randomness to start a proper blog and this is it. Sometimes it's going to be a diary type thing and sometimes it's going to be my thoughts, my real thoughts so... for those who know me forget everything you know about me. Now we have that out of the way lets get started.

Today was possibly the most boring and lonliest days of my life. I was late for school so I got locked out and out of sheer frustration I walked out of the school before theu could lock the gates. I came home to a lonely house and it gave me time to just sit and think. But as luck would have it a friend of mine had to come over and I didn't get any thinking done. But that's not the main topic of this blog (this doesn't have a topic).

I did get some thinking done this morning about something. I realised how I had become reliant on a blade. Sure I haven't actually cut for ages (well 3 1/2 weeks and counting), if I dont have a blade nearby when I'm sleeping (i.e on my bedside table) then I start to feel really nervous and I have to go find one , and then when I do I have to use it to prove to myself that it is a real one that actually works. People say throw the blades away and use the whole "out of sight, out of mind" theory but that doesn't work for me. Not having one around causes me to relapse.

I know this is a really short blog but I'm going to end it there. Does anyone know any other coping mechanisms? If you do tell me I am willing to try everything.

THOUGHT FOR TODAY: Can you breathe out of your nose and mouth at the same time?